Sunday, September 9, 2007

Letter from the Editor

Hey guys,

Another week is done. WHOO HOO! Hope everyone enjoyed the posts this week. My personal favorite was the train-wreck post about Britney Spears. I never realized how passionate I was about her or how big of a role her image played in my life until I sat down and compiled my thoughts on the matter.

Speaking of- I can't wait to see her performance at the VMAs tonight. I'm hosting a get-together at my house to view the awards with some friends. Should be a fun time. I'm going to be taking notes in order to write my thoughts on my blog. I have so much stuff to do to prepare for my little VMA party! And I'm hung over. GRRRRRRRRRRREAT!

On Friday I resigned from my job. "Resigned" sounds so much better than "quit," right? I kind of like to say I quit though, because it's more empowering. The only thing is "quit" seems a little bit rash and ill-planned. But this was all VERY planned and not at all rash. I knew I needed to do it for my own personal happiness and piece of mind. It was miraculous, really. Afterwards, I felt SO much better. Like the stress and sadness from the past 7 months just vanished and I was like, "Wow, I can be me again."

So what's the plan now? I want to get two part time jobs while I figure shit out. I really want to get involved with music again. I realize I'm not the type of person who can just "have a job" for the money. I'm not the type of person who can NOT follow her heart and dreams. I cannot conform. Money does not equal happiness for me. I've always spoke about NYC being my ultimate destination (sidenote: I still plan on living there for at least one year) and where I wanted to be, but what the hell would I do there? I had no direction when I tried it last fall and sort of was just like, "I'll see what happens." I (barely) completed an awesome internship to build up my resume. I did what seemed smart to everyone else and kind of forgot who I was in the process. In the end, I was tired of being broke and everything was falling apart. I applied to jobs in NYC and MD to see what panned out and that's how I got my current job. I don't regret the last 8 months of my life because it has taught me many, many lessons about myself and others. My co-workers have been nothing but kind and I'm super appreciative of it all, but this isn't about them. It's about me. The old break-up adage "It's not you, it's me" is sooooo applicable to this whole situation. Now, I'm going into the unknown. And I can't fucking wait.

Writing has always been a HUGE part of my life and I will continue to write no matter what. Being paid to do it would be nice, but it's so my own personal pleasure and it's such a part of who I am that I'm not concerned with that. Besides, after being out of school for over a year and experiencing the "dumbing down" that accompanies adulthood, I'm not sure I'm as good as I used to be. This blog is a really nice exercise for me to get re-acquainted with my writing skills.

For now, I must go either go back to sleep or start planning for my party tonight. I'm going to try to cook something for my friends. Lord help us all!

Have a nice Sunday!


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